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Always do your best

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I’ve tried to do it right
Using kindness
As my guiding light

Pushed the dark away
Never given up
Without a fight

Except the times
I’ve lost sight
In the darkness

Where evil takes a bite
Of flesh
Sanity and light

Left me with
One less bit of trust
Left to rust
Crusted across

Everything once tight
Unravelled
And come undone

Talking to the monsters under the bed

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896 days
Since you left me
Pushed me
Right into hell
Didn’t even bother
To tell

896 days
Of nonstop replay
In an episode
I never wanted

896 days
Where I stay
Suspended in
My minds displays

896 days
Where I spin
And spin, and spin
All Because of
Someone’s else sins

896 days
Where I strayed
From my path
Listened with dread
To the devils laugh

896 days.
And how many more?
Shall it take?

The best kind of therapy

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We walked today

Just her and I

She met my pace

I stared

At her beautiful face

 

And at her crooked smile

She said she hates

Pink curls bouncing

With the shrug

Of her shoulders

 

Slowly we travelled

And I marveled

At the love I feel

For this every growing

Beautiful girl

 

So much sparkles

In those hazel eyes

As she talks about

The things she loves

 

And when she looks at me

And those eyes say

She loves me too

I want to cry

 

Because I’m the luckiest

The one she calls

Mum

 

When she rushes forward

For a hug

That either I need

Or she does

Or as things happen

We both do

 

My first true love

And she has no idea

Just how amazing

Every part of her is

Alone

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I walked
The tenth step
I took tonight

One step closer
To the edge
Swept up
In haunted reels
Of replayed fear

I cried
The hundredth tear
I’ve cried tonight

Until I lose sight
Of even the barest
Sliver of any fight

Then I died
The thousandth death
I’ve died tonight

With evil on my skin
The pain
And shame
So deep within

Until air from lungs
Burns so tight
Fury turns
So fiery bright

I’ve seen this night
And this horrible flight
Each and every
Turn of earth
And fade of light

You shoulda said

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Why didn’t you tell me
You loved the sunshine
But couldn’t stand the rain?

Could’ve saved us
From so much
Of this unnecessary
pain

I woulda wrapped
It all up
Trapped inside
Kept it hidden
from your light

Stayed here alone
Shivering in this
Pitch black night

Smiled to hide
Tears that slip
Past this mask

All to make
You happy
And feel secure
Away from my fears

Why didn’t you tell me
You loved the sunshine
But couldn’t stand the rain?

Pain

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Pain

From the centre

Of my brain

 

Through every

Racing vein

To rapidly

Beat up heart

 

Every thread

Just falls apart

Left to wonder

 

Do I think?

Do I feel?

Or will this haze

Just never heal?

 

Will I finally

Feel karma

Make me whole?

 

From the centre

Of my soul

Pain

 

When worlds align

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In a perfect world
You’d hold me tight
Run your fingers
Softly caress
Deep into night

In a perfect world
There’s only light
Kisses along spine
Soft whispers
Confirm you’re mine

In a perfect world
We’d feel alone
Happily trapped
In our little cocoon
Dancing sweetly
Under the moon

In a perfect world
There’d be no fear
And every errant tear
Was just because
we laughed
And loved
And held me near

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